I can be fucking lazy as shit. I used to let myself get away with it — so many excuses: I’m tired, I’m not being paid enough, I really don’t like this job — but now I can’t live with myself if I know I am being a lazy fucking asshole. Why the change? Because I realized something: my lifestyle literally depends on it. I can’t make the top dollar I want and deserve if I never make a name for myself. I won’t fulfill my dreams or goals unless I do something truly unique — and unless I do that thing well. Hell, I just worked 9 hours and I’m on my laptop writing this aggravated post just because I know I’ll need this reminder in the future.
You might be asking: “How do I know if I’m a lazy asshole?”
Do you:
- Repeat yourself? Example: Did you do the same thing for one client that you did for another, like, identically? If so, you’re fucking lazy.
- Do a half-assed job? If you’re not proud as fuck to hold up your work, or your word, to the world — then you’re lazy as shit.
- Make excuses? I know, you’ve seen it on a million Instagram posts about getting your ass to the gym — “no excuses.” But it’s so fucking true, and so fucking easy. So just don’t do it! If you really don’t want to do something, there had better be a great reason for it, and it better not align with your ultimate life plan, because if it does, and it is an integral part of the plan — then sorry bro, no excuses.
- Quit early? Hey, I’ll be the first to say I take an early day almost every week — but only if I’ve earned it. That, or it’s free ice cream day at DQ.
- Hate on those who disagree with you? Oooh, now we’re getting deep. And yes, being defensive is lazy. It takes energy and care to listen to those who criticize you, and even more energy to not fire back with a catty comment about how you don’t tell them how to do their job. If you’re not lazy, you’ll say that you understand, and that you’ll find a solution — and then actually find the fucking solution.
- Compromise your dreams & goals for the easy road? How dare you. You privileged, middle- to upper-class crapbag. You are letting yourself down and you deserve better. We all deserve better. We deserve the lives of our dreams — why? Because if we all achieved our dreams, the world would be an infinitely better place. If everyone did what they loved, worked their asses off to succeed in the highest form possible, and were able to live lives that they were proud of, we’d all be unstoppable. And president — we’d all be presidents.
Luckily, I have a solution. There’s the method that works for me: Don’t feel fucking sorry for yourself. I like to think about all the people in third-world countries, starving — not because they have no money, or because they don’t have a job, they are starving until they die literally because there is no food to be had. We are so fucking lucky to have been born in a country where at the tender age of 15 we can (legally) begin earning good money and feeding ourselves. There is no reason why we can’t develop appreciation for what we have at a young age, and grow to want and achieve more.
If you’re not into the whole good-conscience approach, then it’s pretty simple: Imagine your life either without everything you currently have, or imagine your life with ten times more. Then come to know this, in your cold, dead heart: being lazy is a lifestyle. And it’s not the same lifestyle that happy people have. Happy people have drive. They have passion. They have purpose in life. Happy people are not lazy people. Happy people can be lazy, sometimes, yes — it’s not a crime to eat ice cream out of a pie in bed for an entire Thursday — but then they get this tingling feeling, like pins and needles in their achievement bone, and they have to get up and actually DO something. Happy people work toward things that matter, things that change their life for the better.
You can be happy, too. Don’t be fucking lazy.
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